Brotherly Combinations

A man of many companions may come to ruin, 

but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. 

Proverbs 18:24

 

We are trying to create in our family an important base of strong brotherly relationships between our boys.  Yes, they are brothers, but what I see unfolding before my very eyes is that Reece & Chase & Piersen & Hudson are also friends.  I hope they will always stick together because they are brothers...but I also hope they stick together because they are friends.  These four have fun together, they fight together, they compete with one another, they protect one another, they try to be like one another and they sometimes gang up together against one another.  There are a lot of potential brotherly combinations in this "gang-up" gang :)  And every day, heck, sometimes even every few moments, there is a new combination of who is getting along well and who is left out.  When Hudson grows just a bit more - he will surely even out the playtime a bit more.  Yet at the end of the day, through the highs and lows of male bonding - these boys are true buddies!

A while back, the founder of the kids' school made a comment to me - that to him was likely just a conversation maker.  To me, however, it was one of those moments when my heart swelled so big with pride I thought it might explode.  I tucked his words into my memory - they made a deep impact on me because it was my boys' behavior away from home - away from our direct instruction - yet being illustrated the way we desire it to be....  He said, "I watched your boys today at recess.  You need to know, that although they may fight at home, those two look out for one another.  Reece was not gonna let anything happen to his little brother.  He was protecting him. It is obvious that they love each other.  You've got some good kids."

What a powerful statement - "you've got some good kids!" I so believe that to be true.  I have got some good boys! As parents, I think we can get into this bad habit of kind of ranting about our kids - their ages, their stages, their behavior, their discipline issues.... I think our kids sense that. I think they tune into our "adult" conversation much more than we realize.  I am not saying that we fake our way through this parenting thing, but when I step back and think of my boys - they surely are not perfect - but they are good, good kids... And if there are some little ears listening around me - I want them to hear me telling my friends in adult conversation that I have some good boys.  That I am proud of them.  We ought to be speaking positively about our kids when they are listening, and when they aren't. Words are powerful and they influence our attitudes.

So, as a Mom, if my words have the power that I believe they do, I am going to continue on this path of growing a deep, strong, brotherly friendship in each of my guys.  I think that involves some intentionality - instructing them how to value one another, how to interact with their friends and their brothers at the same time (keeping priorities straight), and praying for their brotherly friendships to be deep and strong. Every relationship combination, (and mathematically speaking, there are quite a few combinations going on here in our little family) between all of my sons is going to be unique and special in its' own way... but so far, I sure do love what I see (most of the time! ha!)